MUSLIM DIVORCE

Turkey's 'socially-sanctioned' femicide is exposed in documentary featuring harrowing story of TV anchor who was beaten by her husband in row over their newborn - and a wife shot in her arms and legs for wanting a divorce

•   British-made film Dying To Divorce explores increasing femicide cases in Turkey
•   Movie follows Ipek Bozkurt, lawyer and activist protecting women from violence
•   Details Bozkurt trying to get justice for women who survived horrific assaults
•   Arzu lost her legs and the use of her arms after her husband shot her seven times
•   Kübra suffered brain serious haemorrhage after husband hit her head four times

By MONICA GREEP FOR MAILONLINE
PUBLISHED: 04:28 EST, 1 December 2021 | UPDATED: 04:33 EST, 1 December 2021

The harrowing reality of Turkey's violence against women crisis is exposed in a documentary featuring the heartrending testimony of women who had their children taken from them when they were viciously attacked by their husbands.

British-made documentary Dying To Divorce, released in cinemas last week, shines a light on socially sanctioned femicide in a country where a startling one in three women has been the victim of domestic violence.

The situation has worsened under the autocratic rule of President Erdogan, who champions conservative values and has undermined women's rights. In 2019, 474 women were killed in Turkey, many by partners and relatives.

This year Turkey withdrew from the Istanbul Convention, a legally binding European treaty designed to prevent violence against women, protect victims and prosecute perpetrators, sparking nationwide protests.

TV presenter Kübra Eken, who has worked at Bloomberg News in London, was left with limited mobility and speech and permanent brain damage when her husband beat her over the back of the head in a row over their two-day-old daughter.

Another victim, identified only as Arzu, was left without legs or the use of her arms after her husband shot her seven times in close range when she asked him for a divorce.

During the attack, she begged for him to leave her the use of their arms so she could continue to care for her six children.

Both women had their children taken from them in the wake of the attack. Arzu's were taken into care, while Kübra's child was placed with her violent husband's family.

Selected to represent Britain at the Oscars in the Best International Feature Film category, Dying To Divorce centres on Ipek Bozkurt, a lawyer and activist striving to protect women from violence.

'This country protects murderers who would like to punish their wives, daughters or girlfriends who want to have different things in life than they did before,' she says.

'The legal system should give the correct message to the potential murderer that they will spend their entire lives in prison if they kill someone, if they kill a woman. Women homicides are political.'

Kübra, was a 28-years-old television reporter working Bloomberg News in London for when she met her husband Neptun, who was then working as a producer.

The pair returned to Turkey to marry, but two days after the birth of their daughter, Neptun savagely attacked his wife, hitting her in the back of the head four times.

Kübra suffered a serious haemorrhage which initially left her unable to speak or walk and she had to undergo intensive speech therapy in order to testify against her husband in court.

Neptun claimed the damage to his wife's brain was the result of the Caesarian section operation she had undergone days earlier.

Kübra's husband withheld access of their daughter as the case was ongoing, with Kübra's mother's claiming: 'The court granted Kübra the right to see her daughter three days a week. But his family have never let her see her.'

After strenuous speech therapy, Kübra was able to testify in court and her ex-husband was charged with assault.

He was sentenced to 15 months in prison but his sentence was reduced for good behaviour, meaning he has not spent a day behind bars.

Speaking after the case outside the courthouse, Bozkurt said: 'You see how unjust this system is, so we just have to fight against it. Continue, there's no way I would stop or give up, never.'

Seven years after she was attacked, Kubra and her family were granted full custody of her daughter by the family courts.

'I never lost my hope,' Kübra said. 'I have a future to look forward to with my daughter.'

Arzu was 14 when she married a man 11 years her senior and had six children with her husband before asking him for a divorce after discovering he had a mistress.

She said that despite her husband planning on living with his mistress, he still would not grant her divorce and warned he would 'hurt' her if she left him.

After Arzu insisted on the divorce, her husband shot her seven times in the arms and legs, causing so much damage that she was forced to have her legs amputated and lost the use of her arms.

'The day he did this to me we were going to the courthouse', she said. 'He was very calm. He said: 'Let's go and submit a petition to get divorced by mutual consent'.

I went up to the third floor took the children, came back. He was standing at the door with a shotgun in his hand.

He said 'lie out on the floor and stretch out your legs. I'm not going to shoot to kill you, I'm just going to make you crawl.'
After refusing to lie down, he shot her in both legs before using his feet to drag her arms out from underneath her body and shoot them.

'I put my arms under me. I hid my arms. I begged for my arms, I didn't beg for him not to shoot me, I begged for my arms', she said. 'If I had my arms then I could take care of my children.'

'I said 'Don't shoot my arms, I won't be able to care for my children'. I said even 'If I'm in a wheelchair I can go round after my children but what will I do if I don't have any arms?'

'He pulled out my arms with his feet, pushed the gun against them and pulled the trigger. He pulled the trigger but all I felt was thirst, I begged for a glass of water.

'He wouldn't give me one. He was still angry, He shot my left arm again. My arms and legs were hanging off me. I had completely given up all hopes of living, I begged him: 'Kill me, don't make me suffer'.

Arzu's children were taken into state care while she underwent 13 surgeries on her arms and the mother said she 'really misses' each of her children.

'I asked for custody of my children nothing else', she said. 'I wanted all six of them, I told him go live with his woman. He said 'I'm going to live with her but I'm not letting you go'. He said he would hurt me if I go.

'He's ruined my life. He should give me back my life then I'll forget about the divorce, he should give me back my arms and legs then I'll forget about the divorce.'

Arzu's father Ekrem also appeared in the documentary, admitting his guilt for marrying off his daughter at such a young age, adding that he had 'ruined the lives of his children' in order to keep up tradition.

'A month after they got engaged she said she didn't want to get married,' he said. 'She told her mother who told me but I said it wasn't possible. I said it wouldn't suit our customs, that's all.

'I feel guilty marrying her off at such a young age. Why do I feel guilty? Normally, a girl should be over 18 to get married. I ruined the lives of my children just to keep up the tradition.'

Speaking from a prison telephone as he awaited trial, her husband explained he sees his violence as a consequence of his wife's behaviour, because leaving him meant she 'wasn't a mother of her children'.

According to Turkish newspaper Cumhuriyet, Arzu's husband was sentenced by the Yozgat High Criminal Court to a total of 35 years in prison, 20 years for attempting to murder his wife and 15 years for raping a woman with learning difficulties.

Arzu, who was represented by Bozkurt in court, now lives and works independently and is allowed regular visits with her children.

Bozkurt is a member of WE WILL STOP FEMICIDE, a group campaigning for changes to Turkish law to ensure that women who are murdered or attacked by their husbands receive justice in the Turkish courts.

Over the years it has gained global attention for its work providing legal support for women and the families of those murdered, to staging demonstrations outside court and collecting data on the number of women killed.

The film shows Bozkurt campaigning against legal changes introduced by Turkey’s autocratic president Recep Tayyip Erdoğan.

It also shows recent news footage of a political rally in which traditional Turkish cultural ideals about the sanctity of mothers are used to imply that all women should stay at home.

The film has already been praised at European film festivals, and could be set for Academy Award glory.

DYING TO DIVORCE is now in cinemas and the UK's official Oscars entry for 'Best International Feature Film' Academy Award

Saudi Man Divorces Wife For 'Walking Ahead'

In another case, a Saudi man divorced his wife after she forgot to put the sheep head -- 'the most important part of the dinner' -- on the main dish presented by her husband as he hosted his friends for dinner.

Press Trust of India
Updated: August 21, 2017

DUBAI: A Saudi man has divorced his wife for walking ahead of him despite repeated warnings, a media report said today. Saudis are becoming increasingly alarmed over the rate of divorces in the kingdom for trivial reasons as growing calls are emerging to provide married couples, especially newlyweds, with counselling services.

The man, who was not identified, gave his wife repeated warnings to keep a step behind him, but she kept walking ahead of him after which, he divorced her, The Gulf News quoted the Saudi daily Al Watan as saying.

In another case, a Saudi man divorced his wife after she forgot to put the sheep head -- "the most important part of the dinner" -- on the main dish presented by her husband as he hosted his friends for dinner, the report said.

The woman said that after the guests left, her angry husband accused her of embarrassing him by forgetting to present the most important part of the dinner to his guests.

In another case, a husband divorced his wife during their honeymoon for wearing foot bangles.

Humood Al Shimmari, an official who conducts marriages, said that there has been a spurt in divorce cases in the last two years.

He said that while there are many reasons including evolving views towards traditions and social norms, modern technology was the key culprit.

Lateefa Hamid, a social consultant in Saudi Arabia, said: "Families should educate their young men and women and encourage them to engage in psychological, social and religious awareness and education programmes that will protect future spouses from family problems".